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Capitol Latino

Politics, Culture, Reporters, Thieves

Rent is due on the 6th and I’m short $290. I have four consecutive days waiting tables to breach the deficit, four consecutive days putting the roof over my head at the mercy of the American tipper, along with foreign clientele, who are invariably confused by, and often astonished at, the gamble of it all.

Like a bar, the tables at an American watering hole are real estate the owner employs people at two to three dollars an hour and says, Have at it. In effect, the American batman performs a service that for customers that the proprietor is excused both legally and by society from compensating. “The highway is for gamblers, better use your sense,” writes Dylan. So is the American service industry.

The Great American tipper is a political animal. The Great American barman is a political strategist. The Hawk ‘n’ Dove is a Packers bar, and tonight the Packers play the Vikings at home in Green Bay during Primetime for selling food. But Sunday is an unpopular shift, as the half-price burger is the obvious menu choice.

The Hawk ‘n’ Dove’s burgers are exceptional, and at $4.75, they’re a steal on Capitol Hill; but the better the deal, the lower the bill…

Some people tip a percentage, others tip commensurate with satisfaction, others tip in other ways. Some don’t tip at all. The half-price burger is unfortunate when xcombined with percentage tippers, who unfortunately are not at all uncommon.

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